D A N I E L L A   K A L L M E Y E R

 




"I started hosting community meals years ago when I realized I wouldn't be able to spend every holiday with my immediate family and I was building my own in New York. The first year I made my grandmother's brisket recipe and my mother’s matzo ball soup - a bit of old tradition to anchor my new ones. I set the Seder table for 15 friends, who each brought their own experience to share, or lack thereof. With more intimate shabbat dinners bringing us together in between, the next year we crammed 30 friends -- and friends of friends -- into my upper west side apartment. 'I don't care how we do it, but we’re finishing this seder' and by midnight we were banging on tables singing, telling stories, and holding our full bellies. Few things give me as much heart warmth.

 




Our theme this month is Renewal, inspired by the Zahava Protea Token. How does the notion of wisdom connect back to the spirit of your dinners?

This year was the tenth anniversary of my first FriendSeder in New York so I really did it up with friends new and old. I really dug into my recent spiritual learning, bringing in as much interpretive commentary and storytelling I could share throughout the meal so everyone could find themselves in the meaning of the evening. I really connected to the themes of freedom that Passover brings out, understanding, sharing, and growing from freedom from inner enslavement, inner turmoil, and spiritual liberty. What could relate more to renewal than a whole new phase of life and a new season to go with it.

 




I grew up more religious than most of my friends, so traditionally I wouldn't have celebrated Jewish holidays in a restaurant - we would gather with family, friends, neighbors, cousins. Religion aside, those familial memories feel really nostalgic for me, and creating opportunity to maintain my traditions in a modern way that also was welcoming and not intimidating and inclusive has been a key part in building community and having a constant that could feel new every time.

 




I have definitely felt those hangups when I've downsized apartments or in general never want to turn anyone away and simply don't have the space. That's actually how @Shabboscapes came to be. I literally didn't have enough plates and silverware to accommodate the number of people who wanted a place to experience shabbat. So I started serving finger foods and that transitioned into grazing tables. In the end it gave me the flexibility to include more people with a casual non sit-down feel and keep eating and socializing longer.

 




Farmer's markets and Trader Joes!! Fresh fruits and veggies go such a long way and look beautiful. Crackers and dips - but always re-plate them from their containers! Add your own drizzle of olive oil or garnish. Color makes such a difference and isn't expensive to achieve. Charcuterie or cheese plates…frozen hors d’ouerves if you don't cook. Add your own touch. And fresh flowers!!

 




I like having control over the meal, so I always encourage people to bring wine or a beverage of their choice. Everyone's always happy to, and it saves you the most expensive part of hosting.

 




Ha! If I even have time to change….I have some romantic notion about gliding around in a silk kimono. It feels very decadent…very Paris in the 20s or something.

 




Food brings people together, which is why I love having the 'shabboscape' be a central feature. I also like to encourage a conversation or moment for sharing when I can. It's usually around the energy of the week or something that offers meaning to the rituals of shabbat. It doesn't have to be spiritual, just sharing positivity from the week or wishes for the following, it makes every week about renewal.

 




Not so much an object but my shabboscaping! People have come to expect it. Now even just a small gathering I’ll do a lush platter. Fruits, nuts, cheese, crackers. A cornucopia if you will. I love the idea of inviting people to a luxurious experience even if its just $25 worth of pickings.

 




Poached Salmon lettuce wraps! Butter lettuce cups, A whole salmon (which you could make any way) I usually do a mustard and marmalade glaze. The whole thing takes 20 minutes and people serve themselves.

 




Matzoball soup FOREVER! And my grandmother’s sweet brisket. I've personalized my family’s soup recipe by throwing in parsnip and jalapeño. A little sweet and spicy kick!

 




I invite really good people. People who I know will value moments like these. People who Ive thought of intentionally to connect to each other or will bring something to the experience. I think it happens naturally if the experience is authentic and meaningful.

 




Not usually. Maybe help gather plates. I like the evening to feel like it could go on as long as people want. But the grazing table is so easy to wrap up and toss…I put craft paper down and sometimes I don't even use platters.

 




Leftover alcohol gets carried over to the next dinner - or regifted the next time Im a guest. Leftover food I usually send home with people or invite my closest friends over the next day for lunch.

 




Im going to have to go with the late night grill feast upstate at a very healing and connective weekend. We had watched the bright warm sun set straight through the windows of this beautiful house as we awaited the arrival of the final guests. The late night home cooked midnight meal was just what European vibes and New York goals are made of.

 




A lot of texts in the morning. Not because I need the thank you’s - gratitude is just contagious, but it means we created a feeling that people still could wake up with in morning. Gratitude, joy, full bellies, connection. Life’s most delicious recipe."